if you wanna be friends with me all you gotta do is act like you’re already friends with me
call me by my name
send me porn
type like you’re having a mental breakdown
(Source: seisans, via i-have-the-food)
According to USA Today, the average tumblr user spends 2.5 hours a month on tumblr.
More like 2.5 hours an hour.
(Source: tsarcasm, via i-have-the-food)
Is there a non-sexual way to eat a lollipop
SMASH IT WITH A HAMMER AND EAT THE REMAINS.
settle down there Thor
(Source: theyfoundeachother, via disappear-without-a-trace)